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My heart is screaming Dedicated to Kathryn Mattek Submitted by Dustin Subject: My heart is screaming and I don't know how to make it stop To my Everything, I hurt so bad today, and I can't seem to escape it. I miss you sooooo much! In drastic contrast to my silence, my heart won't stop screaming. No music will calm it. No medicine will cure it. I cannot detach it from me in any way. Like parents taking their baby to get shots, all I can do is sit here while my heart cries out to me and asks why this torture. To say that I need you doesn't cut it. To shout that I love you won't suffice because you are not here. I am starving for you, and it feels like with each passing day I die a bit more. The only hope I hold onto is the excitement and joy that will be ours when we see each other, and the 20 bizillion times more happy we will be when we are joined together as husband and wife. May God be with us and I love you!! Dustin I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. This is an e-mail that I sent to my sweetheart who is New Ulm, Minnesota while I am in Orlando, Florida. We are engaged to be married, but before that we have a year apart. It has been about 2 months, and I have only seen once. When she came we had a week of pure euphoria, but it seemed like only a glance that did not satisfy. We are getting married May 21, 2005 right after she graduates from college. I can't imagine quite yet how I am going to make it through this year. When we get married it will be incredible no matter what, but what a reward Hawaii would be for making it through one of the toughest years of my life and hers. We are not wealthy nor will we ever be. She is going to be a Teacher and a Mom (God-willing), and I am at a Seminary studying to be a Pastor. We both realize that money is not the all in all. We will not be able to afford the luxuries of life including a nice honeymoon, so a trip to one of the most beautiful places on earth would be amazing. Thank you for reading our story.
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